Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Too Far


        Waking from the sleep he never remembered entering, Stan Curnel, opened his eyes and attempted to look about him but his eyes had not adjusted yet and therefore e could not see anything more than a few inches in front of him.  He tried to move his legs and arms, but found that they were being held in place with chains.
Looking out his eyes adjusted enough that he saw the silhouettes of six men standing guard in a small semi-circle in front of him, whether to keep him from leaving or from someone from attacking him he knew not, though he suspected that it was a mixture of both.
Seeing no way that he could get out of this particular situation Stan decided not to waste energy that he might need later and instead focused on trying to clear his mind of the fog that clouded how exactly he had gotten here.
There was a commotion in front of him and he glanced up to see two of the men move aside and bow there heads gently in a sign of respect and let a man pass before taking up their positions once more.
"Stan Curnel," the man said with a booming voice, "long have I waited to meet you, the product of a project long ago destroyed.  How are you?  Well besides being tied up that is."
"Wh- Who are you," Stan asked as he could not see the man's face, what with it being covered in shadows and all.  
"Ah," he sighed and stepped forward showing his face.  "My name is already aware to you as are the things that I have done and the memories that I have left.  My advice to you is that you should turn away from the demons that you face at this moment and turn your undivided attention to the situation at hand, for you have a choice to make, and a choice you have to make indeed." 
With that the man stood back up and clapped his hands once.  At the sound a hundred lights blared showering the place with a brilliant white light and uncovered the most horrible scene Stan could ever had come to face.
They were in a large circular room that must have been a quarter mile in diameter.  The walls were over three stories tall and it was on the walls that the lights were on.  there were three rows of lights that were all equally spaced from each other, not more than a half a foot apart, and they ringed the whole room.  Stan was tied to one end of the room and from where he was he could see that the men he had thought were guarding him were in fact guarding two other people across the room.  Max Curnel and Amanda Camp sat on their knees with gags in their mouths and their hands tied behind their backs.
Stan immediately started to struggle against the chains, but they held fast.
The man that had spoken started to slowly walk towards the other two children as he said in a loud clear voice, "You, Stan Curnel, have caused me a great deal of hurt these past few months and I am quite surprised that you have lasted this long, despite the many men that I have sent to capture you."
"They were weak," Stan responded with an evil that did not match his age.  "Why will you not fight me yourself, rather you resort to trickery and bribes to catch me unawares and stab me in the back. Wh-"
"Silence!!" The man said this calmly but with steel.  At his word Stan was no longer able to speak and try as he might nothing so much as a sound came from his mouth.  "You shall not speak to me unless I feel like hearing your voice, which at the moment I do not."  The man paused a moment and than said, "Do you know what this hall is?"  Without waiting for the answer he continued, "This hall is the place where, many many years ago, a blood oath ceremony took place to give a sacrifice to the great Greek God Zeus.  They would go so far as too kill their own child if they felt that the God had asked them to.
However the locals found out about the happenings and decided that it was high time to put and end to it.  So they put together a small force and stormed the place and arrested everyone inside.  You see though, after they examined the place they found a high level of hallucinogenics and thus closed this place off to the rest of the public.  It has obviously been cleaned since than, yet the townsfolk still to this day steer clear of for fear of whatever the rumor is these days.  This means that whatever I do no one will think twice about it, that is if they hear anything."  At the conclusion of his small speech he walked over to Max and Amanda and put his hands behind his back.
"As for your choice you must choose which one you will sacrifice to Zeus or you can join my ranks as we storm the capitol," With that he pulled two guns from behind his back and put them each to Amanda and Max's head.

OK So I decided to come on back and start this blog up again.  So I have finished my book finally and I sent it to the publishing company for them to review it and I have gotten their reply back from it and I will post a short passage giving a sneak peak later on today.  I hope that everyone out there had a great Thanksgiving and are looking forward to a great Christmas.  Have a good day my friends.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Hey

So I am going to leave this blog alone and move on to something else.  I am not getting as many hits and its a real put down.  If you do read my posts and wish to see more than you can still read them at this websites; Richard Anthony Goulart | WritersCafe.org | The Online Writing Community       Have a great day!!!!!

Monday, October 3, 2011

Allow

To fight another day is all that I am asking you to allow.  My fight takes the turn for the worst as I see you taking his hand.  He is the damned, the man that I have to fight to get rid of.  So now I have to ask, allow my presence to take on a new light.  Let that light take over and shed upon you the ever tangled emotions that I bear.  My mind screams at me, tells me that I am an idiot that I need to shut up and start moving on.  Yet my heart tells me the complete opposite.  You see you took from me what I need.  I can't survive much longer without the love that you must give.  I have tried and failed to take my hand away, to turn away and see another in the same light, but it is you that I want, you that I need.  I have tried and have failed.  I see your photograph as I lay in my bed, and I have an uncontrollable rage that tells me that you are mine and I cannot stand to see you with someone that is not me.  I don't know how much longer I can stand not being with you and, yes hun, yes I am missing you.  Take me with you, allow me the second chance to make the things that I have not done right to be done right once more.  Allow me.  Oh please ALLOW me that second chance that I so deserve.  Just allow it once more.  ALLOW.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Please

Disgraced.  Fighting.  This war is neither mine nor yours, but belongs to the life long battle held between facing off species bent on total destruction of me, you and themselves.  I am sorry, but hun this is neither of our faults, its our nature.  Where do you think that you are going now?  How do you think that I can survive without the warmth in my heart that you filled me with.  Take me to the place that I held so highly, so that I may be the world again.  Hold me in your arms and let me share my love for you.  Speak to you softly and tell you that I love you.  Let me apologize for the person that I have been.  Let me become the person that you need me to be.  Please let me be.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Take This Pain

Frozen and diminished.  My mind screaming your mouth yelling.  What can I do, when the pain I feel is beyond the point of toleration.  Where can I go to escape a fate that is more painful than the thought of death itself.  Losing you has taken a toll on my ever decreasing self confidence, but this is more.  With this you have made me a coward, taken apart by your words of total delirium.  My ears forced to bear witness to the ever growing sound of your total destruction.  Today I gave in and saw at once the mistake that it told.  My witness means nothing as I fight for control of the ever crushing hold you have upon my heart.  Take your hand away and I die, yet keep it where it is and I can't stand it.  Confusing begins to describe only a fraction of what I feel and through these words I find a sort of comfort.  A kind of grace that comes with not having to listen and speak what you wish but what I want.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Breaking Away

Under your wing I have been left, to torment and tolerate the worlds cruelest and beyond sickest punishment that this world may offer.  Left alone with you I shall never be again.  In spite you have risen to great ends to catch me from flying off on the wings off destiny, just to throw me down and shackle me down with words of discouragement that seemed to last an eternity.  Tonight there was a plan, yet with the eagles eyes that you possess, saw right through it and again threw me down.  This time, however, I was ready and you saw exactly what I wanted to, for now you will never expect the plan I held underneath the plan.  Tonight I escape to a world that I and I alone control.  You have no say anymore and it hurts doesn't it?  Does it make you fell helpless, maybe a little like you are lost inside your own little demented head?  This day seems to be your last as my life begins.  Renewed by the fire that you set inside me with the lighter that was your flame.  Now your flame is dimming and I shall not rest untill I become everything that you will never be.

OK SOOOOO.....

So I am thinking that I should just make this into a story telling blog where I tell small short stories and pput the entries that I have here into another blog dedicated to trying to help people overcome their struggles.  I was kind of hoping to hear what other people had to say about this here idea.  If you have any ideas just please comment.  If not I will just do it.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Heart Renewed

To become the person you have tried so hard to keep me from becoming has become my whole life long dream.  There were times when I respected you, yet now all I have to say is good bye and I told you so.  You have failed and it hurts to know that doesn't it.  How can I tell you how I really feel when everytime I open my mouth you make me out to be a bad guy.  Well today my story takes a new turn.  I have broken away never to return again.  You had your chance and now it is mine.  I will not be held down by what you once were nor will I let myself sulk in your ever present shadow, that seems to engulf me wherever I go.  Today I break free!!  Today there becomes no hold on me that you will have.  :-)

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Taken

My mind held captive????  That is what they try and tell me today, this very same day that I stand tall and talk to you.  What can I say in return????  How can I argue with the experts who tell me I have a very common disease????  A disease of the mind, they tell me, perceived in my mind the very likeness of my disease is not yet completely threaded into the bead of my mind......  Who are they to tell me that I cannot heal???  That I cannot find a way to do the things they told me are impossible????  PSH!!!!!  They do not know me if they believe that I will stand idly by as my life passes me by, and just because the experts say that they cannot cure what I have.....  Even that it is not curable at all........  Who are THEY!!!!!!!  They take the fundamental studies that they perform and believe that the study performed accounts for every human being on this planet?????   Well today I stand to say that there is not a reason that I shall believe that and not reason that you will stop me from continuing the things that I enjoy!!!!!!!!!!  GOOD DAY!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, August 26, 2011

UGH!!!(poem)

Love betrays the mind
It lies a false foundation
An inconceived notation of someone elses own needs.

Taken away my mind was.
A certain girl took the very heart that should never have left
I see her now so distant as she is.

A friend she wants to be
A nullified lover she doesn't understand I cannot be
Distrusted you now are.

Taken away, loved conceived and tossed away
Power taken away and thrown to the side
Gripping sentamental value you share in my mind.

You played my mind, embarrassed me
Public displays of my affection that were never shared
You told me it was love that you felt.

Yet where are you now????
Bedding another????
That was never love.

My vows broken,
yours never existing,
where are you now???

I hope you well
The man you think that you have
In two weeks time there will be another.

You will get what you want
Drop him like a hot potato with an old excuse.
I want to be friends!!!!!

WELL HEAR ME NOW!!!!!
As my heart screams at me
I shall not be your friend it tells me.

My mind tells me that to be your friend
It will show you a horrific reality of a life lost.
A life of love that you will never have.

A true man that I am
A true woman that you are not.
Take my word a lover you will never see me as.

Because this day I decide.
My fate is in my hands and my path is chosen.
You have taken another and lost me FOREVER!!!!!!

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

UGH

Love betrays the mind. It lies a false foundation, an in conceived notation of someone elses own needs.  The very thought of falling in love makes a person go to extreme lengths.  Taken away my mind was when a certain girl took the very heart that should never have left.  I see her now as so distant as she is.  A friend she wants to be a nullified lover she doesn't understand I cannot be.  Taken away, loved conceived and tossed away to be made a fool of.  Power taken away and thrown to the side.  You played my mind, embarrassed me with public displays of my affection that were never shared.  You told me it was love that you felt yet if that was the case where are you now????  Bedding another????  That was never love.  My vows broken, yours never existing, where are you now.  I hope you well with the man you think that you have because in two weeks there will be another.  You will get what you want out of him and than drop him like a hot potato with the old excuse.  I want to be friends!!!!! WELL HEAR ME NOW!!!!! As my heart screams at me that I shall not be your friend my mind tells me today that to be your friend will show you a horrific reality of a life that you lost.  A life of love that you will never have, a true man that I am and a true woman that you are not.  Take my word that you will never see me as a lover anymore because this day I decide.  My fate is in my hands and my path is chosen.  You have taken another and lost me FOREVER!!!!!!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Speak

Why must a person allow themselves to become belittled by the inhesitant incognition of another man.  Where lie the dignity in that I must ask you????  How can you justify saying nothing for everything, stand up for what you believe and announce your disbeleif in the inability to fight, the helplessness of those unwilling to take a stand.  Where can I go that I may see the weak stand up to the strng, the strong bow down to the weak, thus showing the world a whole new concept and beleif.  The weak can become strong but never can they when people so rudely and undeniably take upon themselves to walk over the weakness and not try to develop it into a stregth.  Where lie the logic in that.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Desperation

You want want and you need yet almost too often you confuse the two for being one and the same.  Want and need confused together will confuse your very foundation of right and wrong and thus should stay separate.  Confuse them together and the only resultant can be chaos.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

College

So I started college today and I have got to tell you that in only one day I have impressed myself by getting to class early and making like three friends in the first two minutes.  I cannot tell you that this year will be hard because to be honest it doesn't seem like this year will be hard at all considering my Speech Communications teacher and my First Year Experience teacher has completely convinced me that this is just like another day in high school.  I wont take this year lightly nor will I underestimate how the rest of the year might just give me a run for my money.  So I will come at college this year with everything that I have got, no holding back period.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Poem

I chase and I chase
Yet when I come closer to you
You get farther and farther from your Que
I don't know your reasons
Nor do I know you treason's

I think that I could follow your
Wonderful form and use my thoughts of you as my oars
To keep me going and going
To make sure that what I am doing
Is not going to be all in vain
And that my love might yet gain

Your trust and your love
yet for now you are still father
Than I am closer
And I must love still and forever to be above
And gain your trust
Because, babe, my love for you is a must.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

The endless fight continues as my life turns to shreds and my body screams at me that this is a fight that I need not be a part of.  Yet when I back away and try to slip away the reality that there is no way that I can back down, no way that I have the ability to say, "I cannot do this anymore," and so the fight continues....... Now you must wonder what this fight is......   It is a fight, a battle for the control of a very important piece to this puzzle.  Its a battle to control my mind and everyone is trying their hardest to control it because to control that means that you control the very power that I am fighting to keep out of peoples hands...............

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